TNN, Oct 7, 2010, 12.17am IST
Failed to clear civil service exam; woman commits suicide in the city
Read more:
Failed to clear civil service exam; woman commits suicide in the city - The Times of India http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/chennai/Failed-to-clear-civil-service-exam-woman-commits-suicide-in-the-city/articleshow/6702606.cms#ixzz12ym8idhg
CHENNAI: It was the dream of Anu (28), a native of Salem who lived with her doctor sister in Chennai, to be a civil servant. But when the dream could not come true even after two attempts, she ended her life by hanging herself with a nylon saree.
Last Monday, when the younger sister, Dr Manimozhi (23), returned from work to their home in Tiruvalluvar Quarters in Thirumangalam, she found Anu not answering the doorbell. When she looked in from the window, she found her sister hanging. A devastated Manimozhi then informed her parents in Salem and the police.
Anu, daughter of Annadurai, had undergone rigorous coaching in
Delhi to appear for the civil services exams. She had twice managed to clear the prelims but could not clear the finals, police said. She had completed her post graduation and taking all measures that she could to get through the exams.
Dr Manimozhi told the police that her sister had been in a state of depression for the last one week. "She would tell her sister that while she had managed to complete MBBS and get a job, she was yet to get what she dreamt of. She was completely heartbroken ever since the UPSC results came out and refused to get out of home. On Monday, when Manimozhi left for the hospital, Anu hanged herself using a nylon saree," a police official said.
According to behavioural psychologist Sunil Shankar, there was no need for the person to be under extreme duress and that an individual taking the civil services exam would be expected to show more maturity and drive. "Frustration can be caused by over-aspiring (yearning for a goal that is beyond their potential). We cannot rule out peer pressure either," he said.
Pointing out that there was no discounting the fact that the exams can take a toll if a person was repeatedly faced with what they perceived to be failure, the psychologist said this could steer them towards aberrant actions. "A person in their immediate enviroment, like a member of an individual's family or their peer group, should pick out clues such as depression, lethargy and sudden withdrawal from activities. If they make ambiguous statements like, It's been nice knowing you', this is a sign that the person is approaching the end of his or her tether and cannot take much anymore. In these cases, it is imperative that an individual be urged to take a break or seek help from a qualified psychotherapist," Shankar said.
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Chennai IAS Aspirant: Victim of Prelims Discrepancy 2010 |
OUR UNIQUE ANTI-SUICIDE HELP
Well, we too come across our friends who just come and tell us they want to kill themselves for nothing is going to happen to them in the corrupt system. Their merit shall remain unrewarded and the girl friend is getting married and the parents are building on pressure, etc.
These are the common but pertinent problems we all face alike. It hurts to see someone succumbing to them like Ms. Anu Annadurai. She is just one of us. We too several times stand at the point where she stood and took the disastrous action. A second thought could have prevented her. Young men and women of India shouldn't die like this. It is regrettable. We can have more meaningful lives.
We need to develop the ability to appreciate the fact that this degree of knowledge and wisdom that we cultivate during the civil services preparation is a reward in itself, though it may not immediately materialize into a good job and success. We are a lot better than the stuff we come across, working in big MNCs and suit-boots and they aren't sure about the location of Nagaland in the map of World.
A sample sms series to a friend, who got rejected in seven interviews in a row:
Friend (at 1 pm): My life is ruined. For the last 4 years I am sulking in Delhi without job, messing up everything. I am good for nothing. I don't know why am I alive. It is useless. I am a waste.
Us: Men of merit, don't lose heart when faced with adversaries. So many selection in written means you have it in you, you just need to present it properly and a system is required can can appreciate your talent.
Friend: Why do I always make the victim of that harassing system? Why do I suffer due to their unsystematic system? Why? Why? Why??
Us: Be cool and try to understand. It is not only you. We are all victims alike. Young generation of third world countries is suffering from social malices like corruption alike. We can't help it till it takes 100 more years to have a fair system like that of America. Hope we leave a better India to the posterity than what we had recieved.
Friend: I respect your feelings. But how can we think about the village when our own home is burning. I can't be a means to others, until I am myself not worth and capable to do that. Ya, I am not fool and weak, but up to what extent? It was my 8th interview. I know you want to motivate me, but it is enough frustrating, you know..How can I?
Us: Never forget that destiny tests the toughest. Only weaklings and fools get favourable waters to navigate or they wont survive.
Chillex(Chill+Relax) for a moment and ask yourself isn't this knowledge that you attained during preparation, a reward in itself of whom rodents like son of riches stand devoid of ?
Friend: May be, but right now the knowledge reward isn't paying to me anything.
Us: Ok! Then you must die, but you must die properly. You should die in such a manner that it helps us. We are running a protest against corruption and to get coverage as media channels have told, we need to do some gimmicks, stunts like someone voluntarily putting on fire. If you are willing, kindly be Shri Nathadas Manikchand of our movement. Please dont waste your death, like your life. Die for us, die for a noble cause. Volunteer and be against the corrupt UPSC. We need you alive more than dead, but if you are dying please let it be in a generous manner for us. Please, friend.
Friend: Shut Up! I am not dying. You manage/damage your affairs yourself. Keep me away and at bay. Thanks. I am happy.
Chennai Coaching Centre CIVILS EXPERT, coming out for unique social initiative, putting on an Anti-depression helpline through its website to prevent further loss of valuable life:
http://civilsexpert.com/welfare/Anti-Depression-Helpline.php